Shashefski

Good morning. I'd like to wish a big Don't Ever Give Up: The Basketball Blog happy birthday to Mr. Mike Krzyzewski, hereinafter "Coach K". Coach K is by all accounts one of the greatest recruiters, motivators, and strategizers of all times, and has turned the Duke program from an ACC also-ran into perhaps its best program. (And a favorite of racists.)

I'll be completely honest with you. I respect Coach K, but I don't like him. Something doesn't ring true with me about his squeaky clean demeanor or the snobby, entitled, sanctimonious crowd that wears with great pride their blue "D". I often dislike Duke's players, I think Coach K is overrated, and I feel that he's given a free pass with everything he does. I don't know how he's coaching the Olympic team, and I find it abhorrent how impartiality goes out the window whenever any Duke game is announced on national television.

It drives me crazy how officials let him manipulate them. Watch a Duke game and you will almost never see a call go against them. (Unless it's Marcus Hatten smoking Coach K when Duke had the nerve to come to Nasty New York City!) What really kills me is the bandwagon, perhaps the biggest in all of sports [excepting Notre Dame], of jerkoffs who don't know a thing about college basketball and only begin to watch come tournament time so that they can torment real fans by goading on the handsome, intellectual, well-coached athletes at America's Favorite University. It just pisses me off, okay? Okay? What do you want me to say?

In honor of Mr. K's birthday, I just want to discuss why Duke is so grating for me. Coach K is a big part of it. Remember, I respect the guy (even if he did learn everything he knows from Bobby Knight.) He knows how to motivate his players (though I doubt he could ever pull his army-schtick on adult men). He is a great recruiter (regardless of the fact that Duke was not disciplined even in the wake of Missouri and Massachusetts being stripped of Elite Eight and Final Four banners and over $250,000 despite the fact that Corey Maggette admitted taking money from an ex-crack dealer, making him ineligible just like UMass's Mr. Marcus Camby and Mizzou's Jevon Crudup were).

Moreover, Coach K is a decent, loyal person from a humble background, which I can respect (even if he has hinted at leaving his program three different times for the Celtics, Trail Blazers, and Lakers and received subsequent pay raises, and makes millions upon millions from his image while his players, who played a great part in making that image, get a good education and nothing else). [Not that there's anything wrong with a good education, but I know I would put off college for a couple of years to be set for life.]

Coach K's website (here) has a nice little "quotes" section where he philosophizes about his incredible wisdom. For instance: "I don't look at myself as a basketball coach. I look at myself as a leader who happens to coach basketball." "I define passion as extreme emotion." "Making shots counts, but not as much as the people who take them." "Confrontation simply means meeting the truth head on." "Turning down the Lakers was tough, but it is always good to renew your vows to the loves of your life." (There are a ton more, if you're interested.)

I don't really care for this simpy motivational jargon. Maybe Duke players do, but I doubt they are that stupid. This is the kind of fodder that D3 guys who are too stupid to get a real job print out and frame on their wall when they are forced into some crappy job in a fuschia polo on the sideline of their old school.

The other people who love this stuff are the guys in the mainstream media who think that sports is really all about ideology and philosophy, and that all this attitude and anger is just awful. They cry when they watch Hoosiers and probably write thank-you letters to Coach K at every opportunity. They also love to gloat when Duke wins, perceiving each triumph as a victory for their views on sports. Dick Vitale is an enthusiastic example of this.

Vitale, for instance, credits the Cameron Crazies for inspiring devoted college fan bases around the country. (Never mind that when Coach K left for the season with a back injury and the team wasn't as good, they decided to sit at home.) Between Vitale and Billy Packer, an aptly-named commentator of dubious talent, CBS heads up the assault of pro-Duke propagating. Some smaller players like the ACC sports journal are aware of what's happening. "Krzyzewski has created his own little world, one in which he cut off access to all of his players the week before the biggest game of the seasons, one where he can berate the media for writing stories he doesn't like. It's not good for the game."

How much media control does Coach K demand? He once brought members of The Chronicle, the Duke student newspaper into his locker room, telling them that they were going to visit the team. Coach K was lying, and instead used his time to accuse the paper of unsavory coverage that "degrades my basketball team". When the New York Times asked him about his indiscretion, he said "To me, what I do with the students here in the university is a private matter, and it's something I won't comment on."

This same jerk called a press conference to announce that he was thinking about taking a job with the Lakers. One thing that isn't publicized is that the same job had been offered to Roy Williams three times. You know why it wasn't publicized? Because Roy Williams has didn't call a press conference. After the aforementioned press conference, "the timetable for the training center, which officials said has been in the works for a couple of years, was accelerated..." That doesn't really sound like much, though, considering K was already on a lifetime contract, right? "We were able to do a few things for Mike in his contract," acknowledged Coach K's boss after he decided to remain at Duke. (It was reportedly, oh...doubled.)

I am also very bothered by Coach K's conduct towards officials. It wouldn't bother me if K was perceived the way he is, as a bully. The thing is, everyone treats him like some sort of angel, a paragon of sportsmanship, a hero. Look at this interaction over two no-calls that were perfectly normal and which should have been palatable. Sometimes he gets so mad he passes out. And his whining and yelling works. He gets crazy calls. Like this. Hell, if anyone watched any big games with Duke over the years, they know that Duke players have consistently gotten beneficial calls.
There's nothing wrong with getting mad at officials, but it's not good sportsmanship. That's the thing about Coach K. He's not a good sport. He gets so into it that he had to miss a season, leaving his team in the lurch, he tries to influence officials, and he is a bit of a crybaby. He bosses kids around and people think this qualifies him to coach men. I can only imagine how Kevin Garnett will react if K talks tom him the way he does his fancy boy Duke recruits.

You see, the reason Coach K is able to live up to everyone's expectations of what a great coach should be is because of his station. He is a men among boys. I believe that is why he is afraid to coach in the NBA, because there, players are paid for their skill, and they don't put up with this namby-pamby I'm a captain in the military bullshit. Workers in professional environments don't have to be berated and emasculated to be part of a team because they're paid. Coach K can never deal with that, which is why the only thing he'll touch is the Olympics.

He got this job because some idiot (the same one who put Bruce Bowen on the 2008 Olympic team, probably) read the TIME magazine article about how he was the best coach in any sport in America. Now you tell me, how is it that the best coach has never tried his game at the highest level? No one buys this crap with college football, because it's very similar to the pros, but worse. College is the same, but people have this idea that because the fundamentals are better and the players are worse, coaches are somehow more intelligent and resourceful. It's the environment! I'd play by the fundamentals if I wasn't getting paid to win, too.

The thing is, in the big league, you can get a guy like Allen Iverson and beat a team with great fundamentals. Now there, my friend, is a coaching challenge. Talent dispersed over 30 rather than 120 teams. No control over who plays for you.

That's the kind of coach who should be on the Olympic team. I want a Jerry Sloan, a Hubie Brown, a Don Nelson, a Jeff Van Gundy, a Pat Riley, hell, even a Phil Jackson on there. These guys have to deal with adversity, assholes, owners, trades, and the egos of professional basketball players, and the consistently succeed. Coach K? Not on the same level. Not even close.

He'll stay at Duke, he's in the hall-of-fame, and I'm sure CBS will continue its love fest of Duke. There is no love from this blog, though, for a coach that is great at what he does, but certainly not one of the best of all time. Not even close.

Oh, and one more thing: the fans. The dorks that go to Duke, when convening en masse, think they are tough, cool, and deserving of praise. I, with a pictoral essay, would like to disagree. (Captions by Jimmy V)

Motherfucking Duke-Side Crips

My brathes don't sthop me from playing the thaxthaphone for the Duke Band!

Hey guys, wouldn't it be cool if we all got together and instead of drinking beer, opened up our tailgates and...painted each other!?


I like to bring my dad, Billy Packer, to games.


The football team joins in the support.


Dick Vitale in his perm-bag days

"YEEEEAAH! HA HA HA! Did you hear me?"
"YEAAAH DUKE!!! I did! HA HA HA!"

I couldn't really think of anything funny, so how about this: This guy's a fat piece of shit with a stupid costume.

Ladies of Duke: Thank god they keep their shirts on.

That's all, folks. As always, e-mail me at dontgiveupthebasketballblog@gmail.com